Roll over anxiety.

I’m sure all parents say it, but in my case it's a fact. My baby is very advanced. At almost five months old she’s doing all kinds of new things – eating solid foods, laughing spontaneously, and (almost) sitting up on her own. She can even support her own weight and stand up with her hands on the edge of the couch. She’s a little wobbly and it only lasts for a few moments, but she’s doing it. Like I said, she's advanced, but the one thing she hasn’t figured out yet is rolling over.

It never occurred to me to be concerned about it until the neighbor’s kid came over for a visit. Only a few days older than Madame, he was on his back on the floor, and then rolled right back over onto his back, and then back again onto his belly. Wait a minute. My kid is supposed to be the advanced one. Is something wrong here?

My wife blames it on the lack of “belly time” we give her, though Madame hates it so much it’s not a fun thing for either of us. Every time I put her on her stomach she lifts her head, wiggles her arms and legs, grunts and gets all pissed off. And then when I flip her over on her back she gives me this look like, “What the hell was that for?” No crying, just that look. I can take her crying, even unreasonable screaming, but that look is unnerving.

Anyway, I figure she’s due to roll over on her own any day now, which makes life around the house a little more interesting. She’s not a little meatball you can put down for two seconds and answer the phone anymore. She hasn’t taken a header off of the couch or rolled off the bed yet, but I’m sure in a moment of parental weakness she’ll be right there to flip herself onto the floor. Until then I guess I’ll be putting her on her belly, hoping she gets pissed off enough to roll over onto her back. I can take that look if I have to.