The Babbler

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BabblerChristmas has come and gone and all-in-all I think it was pretty successful. My dinner (grilled turkey) came out really good and, as expected, Madame got lots of loot. There are a few things she got that I’m particularly interested in (some of which I’ll probably blog about later), but one of the more interesting things is The Babbler.

The Babbler is this plush toy that speaks Spanish, French and Japanese to the baby when it’s shook or moved. Not a particularly revolutionary idea, but instead of just saying phrases or words The Babbler concentrates on vocal sounds not found in English. It repeats the sound three times, and then says the word. For instance, when it’s in French mode, it will say “ru, ru, ru, rouge.” The idea is that if a child is exposed to these different vocal sounds early on in life, then it will be that much easier for them to learn the language when they get older. Kind of a cool idea and it’s not too annoying to listen to (yet). It has two volume levels and it seems pretty solid, though it is kind of heavy (for a child’s toy).

It’s out of stock at Amazon.com, but my sister got it at geniusbabies.com (geniusbabies has a much more in-depth explanation of it as well).

Fifth month developments.

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Well, we’re a day past Madame’s 5 month birthday, and like I blogged about last week, my little girl is still very advanced. In hindsight it doesn’t seem like the fourth month was incredibly eventful, but she’s well on her way to some big milestones. The new developments this month were:

  • Laughing Spontaneously: This one is great. Sometimes I can just make a funny face or say something and she’ll just look at me and laugh. Or sometimes there isn’t any reason I can figure out at all. She’s also very ticklish, which is fun, but it’s the random laughs that get to me. Of course, the second you try to repeat the face or what you were saying, it isn’t as funny anymore, and you just get that slightly condescending puzzled look.
  • Screaming (or, Let’s Figure Out How Loud My Voice Is): This is easily my least favorite. I don’t do well with high pitched sounds anyway, and man can she send a high-pitched yelp right through my skull. And the weird thing is it’s not from laughing or joy, but it seems like it’s just so she can see what she can do.
  • Unassisted Standing: She’s no Tiger Woods, but she’s so good at standing now that I can stand her up and put her hands on the couch and she will stand there by herself. Eventually she falls but the whole time she’s doing it she’s grinning like a crazy person.
  • Sitting Up into a Tripod: When last month all she wanted to do was sit up, now she can do it (pretty much). Her new favorite thing is to sit up in the corner of the couch and play with a toy. If she starts to fall forward, she knows now to put her arm down to brace herself (into sort of a baby tripod). If she falls over however, there’s no getting back up without some help.
  • Reaching and Grasping: The toy we hung from the handle of her car seat is now getting some use, as now she’s interested in grabbing for it. The good is not without the bad however, as she'll also use her gooey baby hand to reach up and grab my glasses.

This month has really made it clear to me that all the milestones you hope for (sitting up, walking, talking etc.) are really just the end of a long chain of smaller, more modest milestones. Nothing is going to happen overnight I guess. Anyway, thanks for the self-indulgence.

Desperate for a good article about SAHDs.

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You know what sucks? Having to complain about every article about stay-at-home-dads that I read in the newspaper or online. The NY Times, trying to cash in on the Desperate Housewives phenomenon, did a story yesterday about desperate househusbands (without actually saying “desperate househusbands” which I guess I should be happy about, but I’m not). Apparently we stay-at-home-dads are desperate because we are “isolated,” and “fish out of water,” and “islands in a sea of women.” What a bunch of crap. If you feel isolated or different, get over yourself and make some friends, start a blog, connect with some dads. And remember you're doing the most important job of your life. Don’t bitch to the NY Times.

This article of complaining, whining dads pisses me off, but they saved the best for last:

And while the desperate housewives on Wisteria Lane have their exciting trysts with teenage gardeners and mysterious neighbors, there are seemingly few worries that these stay-at-home husbands have any potential for steamy affairs with their female counterparts. After all, what is threatening about a man loaded down with diapers?

"It takes one's manhood, chews it up, spits it out and does it again," said Gregg Rood, 43, who has taken care of his daughters, ages 7 and 11, in Westfield, N.J., for two years. "You really need a strong marriage and confidence. I don't have a lot of friends who could do this."

Kiss my ass NY Times. I may be slinging a diaper bag, but I’m sexy as hell.

Housewives Try This For Desperation [NY Times. Subscription required (or BugMeNot)]

Oh, and I'm not the only one talking about this. Check out Rebel Dad's comments (Wednesday, December 22 entry) and Daddy Types.

The patron saint of dads.

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Libby Purves has written a great Christmas essay about St. Joseph in the London Times. You know Joseph, he's the guy in the nativity scene you kind of forget about; just another new dad trying to do right by his family. Read the essay if you get a chance - I'm already thinking about Christmas in a new way.

The Patron Saint of Dads [The Times Online, UK]
"Joseph" by U.A. Fanthorpe

True Dads? Snooze Dads.

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Like I blogged about last week, I finally got around to watching that True Dads with Bruce Willis show yesterday, and I for one thought it left a lot to be desired. I guess it's what could be expected from SpikeTV, but it's too bad it wasn't more thought provoking. Here are my two cents:

  • Every dad story except one was about a father-son relationship. The show might as well have been called "True Father-Son Relationships with Bruce Willis". That actually might have been a better show. As a dad with a daughter, I would have liked to see something besides an overwhelmed and overjoyed first-timer like myself.
  • Bruce Willis, I swear I was rooting for you, but damn are you wooden. How is it that a guy who's had great movie and television roles acts so stiff when narrating or talking on camera? I guess I've got to work on separating the art from the artist.
  • Enough with the music montages. I'm supposed to be touched. I get it.
  • The only advice that I could discern for dads was to love your kids. And spend lots of "quality time" with them. Duh.

Oh well. Most of the stories were interesting, but the whole thing could have been half as long and twice as good. At least now I've got two hours of space freed up on my Tivo.

A distinction shared by a privileged few.

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If you're nine months pregnant, live in the UK and are about ready to give birth any minute, you probably don't need me to tell you but your kid might have a gig in eight years. If Britain is successful in it's bid for the 2012 Summer Olympics, all children born today ("20-12" in the British way of writing the date) will have the opportunity to take part in one of the ceremonies of the games.

Take it from me, it could be worth it. When I was five I got picked out of the crowd to march in the Ringling Bros. Barnum & Bailey Circus when it came to town. A fairly uneventful occurrence, but I got a sweet certificate acknowledging that I "...partook in the most fabulous salute to the "Spirit of 76" ever conceived; a distinction shared by a privileged few."

Their certificate probably won't be as cool, but I'm sure whatever they get could hang in their guest bathroom someday too.

2012 Olympic Kid Bid [UK Sun]

What good is that baby monitor anyway?

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I should probably preface this by disclosing that, due to spendingmuch of my pre dad-life in rock bands, I have a pretty average case of tinnitus (constant ringing in my ears) that I’ve learned to live with. My hearing is OK – it’s a little tough to understand people in crowds and it’s generally known I keep the television up too loud – but the only truly annoying side effect is that certain noises, particularly high pitched noises, sound particularly loud to me. Or maybe it’s just that I notice them more.

Anyway, so when the baby monitor is on and Madame is in bed soundly sleeping, all I can hear is that high pitched radio sound. Usually it’s not that big a deal, but I’ve been tempted to turn it off in the middle of the night when my wife is sleeping and it is driving me to distraction. I haven’t done it but it got me thinking, what am I listening for anyway? She sleeps through the night, so if she stirs or cries for a few moments she always falls back asleep. She’s in her empty crib alone, with no chance of rolling out, and I would hope that anything that happened in the house to be cause for alarm would also wake me up. I’ve been racking my brain to think of things that the monitor could alert me to, and I’ve come up with four:

  1. Ninjas come in through her window at night and steal her. This would be a tough one, as ninjas are notoriously stealthy and would likely be hard to hear on a baby monitor, but a brief scream from my Madame heard over the monitor might wake me.
  2. She decides she’s had enough sleep, stands up in her crib and vaults herself over the side, landing on the floor. This might be one I’ll have to worry about in a year or so, but at five months I’m pretty confident this won’t happen, though she is advanced.
  3. Any electronic toy or device in her room spontaneously turns on and starts making a racket. I don’t see this one happening as I don’t believe in ghosts (I’m thinking about that creepy clown in Poltergeist here), but I guess you never know.
  4. She starts talking in the middle of the night. Now this would be something to blog about. I’m lying in bed trying not to hear the silence over the monitor and my five-month-old says something like “Love you daddy,” or “Fire truck banana robot.” If that happened I sure would be glad I had that monitor on.

Also on MDD - Best Baby Monitor (2-16-07)

Get the Fisher Price "Private Connection" Monitor with Dual Receivers (one for upstairs, one for down) for $38.72 from Amazon via the Modern Day Dad Store.

Roll over anxiety.

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I’m sure all parents say it, but in my case it's a fact. My baby is very advanced. At almost five months old she’s doing all kinds of new things – eating solid foods, laughing spontaneously, and (almost) sitting up on her own. She can even support her own weight and stand up with her hands on the edge of the couch. She’s a little wobbly and it only lasts for a few moments, but she’s doing it. Like I said, she's advanced, but the one thing she hasn’t figured out yet is rolling over.

It never occurred to me to be concerned about it until the neighbor’s kid came over for a visit. Only a few days older than Madame, he was on his back on the floor, and then rolled right back over onto his back, and then back again onto his belly. Wait a minute. My kid is supposed to be the advanced one. Is something wrong here?

My wife blames it on the lack of “belly time” we give her, though Madame hates it so much it’s not a fun thing for either of us. Every time I put her on her stomach she lifts her head, wiggles her arms and legs, grunts and gets all pissed off. And then when I flip her over on her back she gives me this look like, “What the hell was that for?” No crying, just that look. I can take her crying, even unreasonable screaming, but that look is unnerving.

Anyway, I figure she’s due to roll over on her own any day now, which makes life around the house a little more interesting. She’s not a little meatball you can put down for two seconds and answer the phone anymore. She hasn’t taken a header off of the couch or rolled off the bed yet, but I’m sure in a moment of parental weakness she’ll be right there to flip herself onto the floor. Until then I guess I’ll be putting her on her belly, hoping she gets pissed off enough to roll over onto her back. I can take that look if I have to.

Toys, gifts, and more toys.

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It's probably because I'm not done shopping yet, but I’ve got gifts (especially toys) on the brain. Here are some gift related items I’m lumping together this morning:

Fresh wooden toys.

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WoodenfelissimotoysA brief andoddly depressing trip to a Kay-Bee toy store this past weekend has only helped me come to the realization that most kid’s toys are plastic pieces of crap. For every well conceived and well-made product, there are twenty more cheap, plastic things that beep or make some other sort of annoying noise. And then there are twenty more just as cheaply made, but with some sort of television or movie tie-in. I know I’m probably a little naïve about this (I don’t have a toddler demanding Dora the Explorer stuff yet), but wouldn’t some good design and a little old-school craftsmanship be better?

Then last night I saw these wooden toys on Boing Boing. They’re designed by Rodney Alan Greenblat, a guy who among other things is apparently the genius that designed the characters in PaRappa the Rapper (one of the only Playstation video games my wife would play with me back in the day). The toys are part of a line of products he designed for a Japanese catalog company called Felissimo, and they look pretty cool to me. Boing Boing recommends the Crazy Box, Wooden Man and Bird Clock, which seems to have worked because they are sold out of all of them (more will be available on the 15th).

Die Hard Dad? Too easy. How about, Tears Of The Son?

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I suppose I should file this with the Hey Dad - Let's Talk board game in the "don't be so quick to be so cynical" column. Apparently SpikeTV is taking some time off from showing Star Trek: The Next Generation reruns to air a new two hour special called True Dads with Bruce Willis.

Bruce Willis? OK. Right off the bat I want to make fun of it. Because when I think "fatherhood" I think Die Hard: With a Vengeance. But then I reconsidered - he's got three kids and a famous ex-wife who's dating someone 23 years younger than he is, so it's not like his life is without complication. He certainly has more fatherhood experience than I do, and someone has to host the show so why not the dude from Moonlighting?  I guess the plan is to examine six unique fatherhood stories, and pepper in some advice and anecdotes from famous dads like Matt Lauer and Alec Baldwin. It could be good I guess (anything promoting responsible fatherhood is good thing I suppose), but two hours sounds like a long time. If you're interested it's on this Friday December 17 at 9PM.

Spike TV and Bruce Willis Explore the Importance of Fatherhood in America With an Unprecedented Two Hour Primetime Special  [Press Release]
Bruce Willis TV special to inspire 'new generation of dads' [UPI story]

When it's OK to talk to strangers.

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I love it when people mess with telemarketers, which is why I'm pointing you all to the footnote of Russ' latest post on the Daily Yak. He says his son loves talking on the phone, so whenever he gets a sales call he just hands the phone to his boy. "Want to sell me something? You gotta get through the kid first!" Simple and perfect. This is an idea I'll definitely be using in a year or two.

In the meantime if you want some more fun stuff to do with telemarketers, print out the Anti-Telemarketing Counterscript and keep it near the phone. (And I would be remiss if I didn't mention the genius of Jim Florentine's Terrorizing Telemarketers comedy CD series.)

Good things happening to good people.

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At first I was going to write about a news item I saw about a study showing men who use laptop computers on their laps may be lowering their sperm count, but then I saw this story.

I doubt this happens often, but this time the $27M California lottery jackpot went to a couple of people who deserve it. Steve and Debi Cifelli are infant abandonment advocates who have spent much of their lives working to stop the needless deaths of babies that others have left behind. Debi apparently was the driving force behind California passing the Safe Haven Law in 2001 which "...allow[s] desperate mothers to leave newborns at safe locations without fear of prosecution." It's unthinkable that such a law needs to exist, but I'm glad it does. Now the Cifelli's will use much of their new money to support their ongoing efforts to publicize the law, and hopefully save more children in the process.

Do-Gooders Win Lottery Jackpot - CBS News
(Horrible headline, good story.)

Hello? It's for baby.

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MobilebabytoyA cellphone is a lot like Los Angeles. People love to bitch about it, but they could never think of living without it. Now it seems that your kid might feel the same way. I saw this article yesterday about a company called Mobile Baby Toy. It's a pretty simple idea really You download a piece of software into your (mostly) Nokia cell phone and it turns your cell phone into a beeping, flashing toy for your kid to play with. I guess the point is to give your child something to distract them in a pinch if nothing else is handy, while at the same time preventing errant calls to foreign countries.

It's not for me (I rock a Treo 600), but for 9.95€ it might be worth it. Though my gut says teaching your kid that a cellphone is a toy probably isn't the best idea in the world. Unless you don't mind it in pieces all over the supermarket floor.

Oh. That's why I'm turning into a fatty.

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Sleep deprived parents like myself who could stand to loose a few pounds just got one more excuse. Apparently researchers at the University of Chicago have found that chronic sleep loss may actually increase your appetite. So if  "I just don't have enough time to exercise," or "It's not my fault if I unwittingly tried to keep up with my pregnant wife's increased caloric intake" don't quite have the same punch that they used to, now you can really blame the baby.

Sleep Loss May Rev Up Appetite - Reuters

(Disclosure: I'm not really sleep deprived - Madame has been sleeping through the night for months now - I'm just lazy.)

Making mall Santa memories.

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What Inever realized before my dad-life was that once you have a kid there are things that you, as an American parent, are obligated to do for your child that you never had to think about before. I’m not talking about sending them to college or making sure they take swimming lessons, but smaller things that aren’t as critical but are still a part of being a kid. Yesterday we took part in one of these small tasks – the Santa visit.

Let me say first that my baby, a whole four and a half months old now, is a genius at getting her photo taken. We dressed her up in her Christmas outfit, waited in line for almost an hour, and when it came time for her to shine, she dazzled. We put her on Santa’s lap, walked behind the camera, told her to smile, and BAM! She lit up the east end of the mall right in front of the Sears like it’s never been lit up before. But I digress…

Everything on the surface was pretty much what I expected, a long line, lots of kids, and a Santa with a real beard. Here are the things I wasn’t expecting:

  1. There are three types of kids that go see Santa. The young babies to pre-toddlers (who either smile or freak out uncontrollably with stranger anxiety), the young true believers (who are easily the most fun to watch), and the kids who are way too old to be visiting Santa. It’s this last group that bummed me out, as they were all obviously there because their parents needed that photo of them with Santa so much that they couldn’t let their pre-teen have a little dignity. One dad even yelled at his son, “Come on Wade, SMILE.” Um, hey idiot, maybe your kid can’t smile because he’s too self-conscious about sitting on a stranger’s lap. My wife said that Wade should just close his eyes every time they tried to take a photo until his mom and dad gave up. Unfortunately Wade just smiled and got it over with.
  2. There weren’t any candy canes. One thing I remember from doing this when I was a kid was that at the end after you told Santa all the things you wanted, you got a candy cane. We got a "The Original Holiday Classic Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer Available Now on DVD" CDROM instead from Santa, that has holiday games for the kids to play and a fresh AOL install. I guess everything has to be a marketing opportunity nowadays.
  3. Even the adults who have children who have no idea what’s going on call him Santa. What else were we supposed to call him? His name is probably Jim or something, but if I don’t call this dude Santa, well then who am I ever going to call Santa?
  4. According to Jim Santa, the most popular item for kids was a Nintendo Game Cube. The most surprising item lots of kids were asking for: electric guitars.

High chair decisions.

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A running theme in my dad-life (and consequently on thisblog), has revolved around trying to find the best stuff for my child without my life becoming overwhelmed by bunnies, yellow ducks and ugly furniture. Some battles I’ll happily loose if it keeps Madame occupied and happy (like her swing does), but some are worth fighting, especially for the things she doesn’t directly interact with. So now that she has started down the path of solid foods, we had to decide on what kind of high chair to get.

NestOriginally I was very interested in getting the Nest chair from Mozzee. It’s a beautiful, modern pedestal high chair that will convert to a toddler’s chair later on. You have to order it from the UK, but because it would be a big part of our lives for quite some time I was willing to justify the expense. And the expense is the real issue – almost $500 (with the exchange rate) before shipping.

KinderzeatThe other high chair option I was coveting considering was the Stokke Tripp Trapp (formerly called KinderZeat). Reminiscent of the Rietveld Zig Zag chair, it’s a clever design that adjusts the foot rest as your child grows. I guess the theory is that if your child’s legs aren’t swinging about wildly in a normal dinner chair, then the child will be more grounded and less wild at the table. It makes sense to me, and it looks great too, though it's really more for kids a little older (starting for kids 1½ years old). It's available for $199.99 at Amazon.com.

AntilophighchairThen I found this simple high chair from Ikea a while back and I realized that I could reach a compromise. The chair is basic, solid, looks pretty good and costs a whopping $15 (with the tray that is). For that price we can double up and get a KinderZeat for when it’s time to transition her out of the high chair and to the dinner table with the rest of us. We got one at Ikea on our way home from Thanksgiving last weekend and it’s working great.

The chair that is, the feeding is more of a challenge.

Princess nation.

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My littlegirl is still a baby, but if you’ve got one a little older (and even if you don't) you might enjoy this article over at Salon.com, A Nation of Little Princesses by Christopher Healy (subscription required, but you can click through for free if you agree to look at an ad). His daughter (like a lot of little girls apparently) is enthralled with the idea of being a princess, and the article mostly discusses whether or not this is a good thing. A lot of it is encouraged by consumer products, especially Disney’s Princess line of products, but it’s also coming from more supposedly unlikely sources like Dora the Explorer. It’s nice to see a dad writing from his perspective, and I suppose these are the sorts of child-raising (and little-girl-raising) challenges that I also have to look forward to. You know, when I was younger I never thought that I would ever have to ponder the pros and cons of your daughter wanting to be a princess, but now it’s interesting to me. Life is funny that way.

Hold 25 everythings.

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AdventcalendarWhen I was in NYC a few weeks ago I visited Hold Everything(looking for a magazine rack) and while I was there I saw something kind of cool, the Adler Advent Calendar. It’s a green lacquered box with a little door for each day of the season that spins around and reveals an illustration of a partridge. Behind the door is enough space to put a piece of candy or some other treat. If you got sick of the partridges you could even cut out pictures of different holiday things with your child and tape them to the inside of the doors. It looks beautiful and modern but at the time I wasn’t prepared to drop $148 on an Advent calendar, even if it is something we would enjoy for many years. I’m guessing I’m not the only one, because now it’s on sale for $99.99.

Road trip lessons.

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We're back from our first road trip with Madame and everything went pretty well. Everyone had a good time and she was, as expected, the queen of the party. Here are some lessons I learned:

  1. Bring the pack 'n play if you can. Even if you don't think you'll use it.
  2. If you're staying at a hotel with a crib, call ahead and make sure they've got the crib in your room all ready to go. Because they could loose the keys to housekeeping when you get in at 12 AM. And dad, you might be out of luck. Unless you remembered the first lesson.
  3. Bring one of your own crib sheets.
  4. Washing bottles is a pain, and that fact doesn't change when you're away from home. Throw in that bottle washing brush with the extra bottles.
  5. One "baby station" (swing, bouncy seat, play mat) is enough. More is just overkill.
  6. Make at least one extra bottle for the car. The extra you don't think you'll need will come in handy in impossible holiday traffic.
  7. This is going to get way more difficult the older she gets. I think.